MoveOn.org Is So Pathetic
…in the face of the Republican political steam roller of death. Today’s MoveOn.org email — subject: “disgusting” (oh my, but such strong language!) — hopes to enrage us with the news that “John McCain and Sarah Palin are repeatedly deceiving, manipulating, and flat-out lying.” Yawn. Whining about the other side playing dirty doesn’t win elections.
Today’s response from Obama: “Enough is enough.” Oh really? Are you sure about that? Mr. Obama, I beg you: it’s time to unleash your angry inner Mark Morford:
“Aww, just look at you. You seem a little upset. A mite peeved, even.“Heck on a hot pancake, I’d even go so far as to say you were downright angry, given how I can see the ripples of general upsettedness and waves of appalledosity coursing through your hot liberal body like fresh biodiesel through a converted VW van. Really now, that can’t be good for your chakras, can it?
“What’s wrong, buttercup? Right-wing politics got you down? RNC ’08 making you gag? Toxic and inexcusable events of the past eight years make you deeply sick to your stomach, spleen, heart, mind, spirit and even your kneecaps? Or is it the wretched notion that the bizarro-world McCain-Palin agenda wants to continue more of the same?
“Or maybe it’s this: Maybe it’s all this terrifying new evidence that there still seems to be this huge pile of Americans who aren’t all that concerned with — or even aware of — just how violently the GOP continues to dump all over their very heads. Is that what’s making your blood boil? Aww, there, there, now.
“Really, I have to say, what nerve you libs have, daring to be angry at a time like this. This is a time of optimism and change! This is a time of true, red-blooded American mavericks, of hot Alaskan redneck babes and giant phallic guns and military fetishism and zero birth control, of teen pregnancy and God and freshly slaughtered moose on the dinner table!
“Can’t you sense the patriotism? Hell, McCain-Palin is so damn American it might as well be a McDonald’s McRib sandwich dipped in Crisco and cooked over a Chevy Tahoe’s exhaust pipe at a tailgate party in Kid Rock’s bowels. Feel the jingoism, hippie!
“You know what you should do, angry lefty? You should take a page from the Republican Convention. Just look how perky they all are, doing that incredible dance of the true blind American, completely blocking out the pain and misprision of their party’s leadership — the failed war, the fiscal disaster, the least popular president in a lifetime, the secrecy and scandal and historic ineptitude — much in the same way an insane cat lady blocks out the all the cold lumps of fur piling up in the freezer. Really, why can’t you be more like that?”